Spanish class. My best and worst subject.
How is this possible?
Well, perhaps it has something to do with my irrational fear of public speaking. Public speaking meaning speaking in front of more than three people. Maybe four, depending on how well I know them.
When my teacher asks me something privately, or at least when no one else is listening, it's like I'm half hispanic and I've been speaking Spanish along with English my whole life. (Okay, exaggeration...) But then when I'm called on in class to answer something.... it's like... "hablo..... que... how-do-you-pronounce-that.... I-don't-remember-what-this-word-means..." You get the picture. lol It's actually pretty funny, at least for my close friends. They don't really understand my phobia.
They really don't get it. When I get up to present any school project, my entire body shakes, my heart races, and I swear I forget how to breathe. And I totally suck at pretending that I'm not nervous. Oh my word.
In any other situation, if I'm a little nervous but not petrified, I just get really quiet. I was actually texting one of my friends not too long ago, and I happened to mention how I get super nervous before school dances. He was like, "What...? You are?" I was like, "Yeah, but I mean I get nervous no matter what when I'm around guys. Why do you think I'm always so quiet around you guys?" He said he'd never really thought of that before. That's what a lot of people think.
"She's just shy."
Story of my life. But it's not too bad, people always assume the quiet one is sweet and kind. Like seriously, you don't know how many times classmates have written that in my yearbooks.
"You're so sweet and kind! I'm going to miss you over the summer!"
As much as I detest the whole "shy and quiet" label, it's always nice to have that kind of reputation with people to begin with. So I suppose my nervousness is sometimes a good thing? (:
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